Rabu, 13 Desember 2006

i'm alive

and that's enough. this past week, a member of my step-mom's family passed from this life to the next. she wasn't afraid to die. she knew the Lord and she knew where she would spend her eternity. i still think she was too young, but God makes all things beautiful in their time. when someone close to you or to someone you love dies, it makes you think about your time on this earth. it all goes by so fast. i hope to make the most of my life. i care less and less about what other people think, partly because i don't have time for it. i'm doing my best. all we can do is trust that God will lead and guide us and help us make the best decisions. why get all caught up in drama when there are people around you who don't know the Lord? i'm not perfect...i never will be, but i can strive to be better. i trust God to take care of me and my family. i'm so thankful for the time i have here, but i know this isn't my home.

ministry is not at all what i expected it to be. when i was a teen, i thought, "how great it would be to be at church all day!" and it is. it's an amazing blessing and honor to work among so many Godly, upright people. it's always encouraging. but, there is a side to ministry that most people will never see. lorin and i have had to grow up big time. it's not easy. and from what i can see, it never will be. but, this is where God has called us. i love being in the ministry. i love how it stretches me, even though in the midst of change and heartache, it can feel like it's not even worth it. but, it always is.

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