Rabu, 28 Februari 2007

where are the Depends when you need them?

my hubby sent me this email today:

If you don't laugh out loud after you read this you are in a coma!
This is even funnier when you realize it's real! Next time you have
a bad day at work think of this guy.
Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana .

He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.

Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio
station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne , Indiana , who was
sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.

Hi Sue,
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.
Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling
down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with
you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.

Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you
with a few technicalities of my job.

As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit
to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is
quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel
powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment
sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature.

It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is
taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and
I've used it several times with no complaints.

What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the
hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my
whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.

Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to
itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse.
Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out
from my back, but the damage was done In agony I realized what had
happened.
The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into
my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish
couldn't stick to it However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.

When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually
grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt.

I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator.
His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with
five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.

Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three
agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes
before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry
decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing
but my brass helmet.

As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter
running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub
it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber.

The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days
because my butt was swollen shut.

So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much
worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.

Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job."

Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish
bad day?

May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!!

Jumat, 23 Februari 2007

this is bad

i may end up gaining a little too much weight during this pregnancy. i'm not exaggerating even a little bit, but i eat CONSTANTLY. i can't stop or i'll get nauseous. it's really nice having a husband who's so willing to run out and get me whatever i'm craving at the moment!

janine and i met joy at the blue iris today for lunch and then lorin and mikel showed up as well. if your in the area, you HAVE to go there. it' s amazing. try the "day after thanksgiving" sandwich...yum! i'm getting hungry again.

when janine and i were walking to the restaurant, we passed a display for a local photographer's business and saw matt and bree!!!! the most beautiful wedding pictures, i have to say. i snapped a shot with my cell, but don't want to spend the money to email it to my computer, sorry. you'll just have to take my word for it and sooth your disappointment with a rosewater lemonade and a parisian ham sandwich.

Selasa, 20 Februari 2007

welcome to the family

pastor joe is hilarious. i was so impressed this weekend, i have to share...and brag on my hubby and the rest of the CT a little. :)

Kamis, 15 Februari 2007

i don't have a title for this post, mainly because i'm not even sure what i want to say. last night, lorin and i watched "jesus camp" with our friends matt and joy. i think it's pretty safe to say we all walked away a little frustrated and confused...maybe even a little upset. lorin and i had a loooong talk after watching and are determined not to "indoctrinate" our children. without getting into too many of my own opinions, i think it's worth seeing.